Monday, November 29, 2010


I heard from my nurse.  My beta was negative.  She said that my RE and the embryologist are going to go over all the information on us and she'll give me a call later in the week to schedule an appointment to meet with the RE and go over things.  I guess I am really not shocked by this given the state of our embryos and the fact that they were willing to put back 3.  The plan we bought was for 2 cycles, but I am not starting another cycle until I have more testing done.  The RE told me before this cycle that he didn't think that immune testing and such told them a lot and even when it did rarely was there anything they could do or did it change their protocol.  I trust my doctor, but I don't think that was a good answer.  I have been reading a lot of blogs since then and I know of at least 2 bloggers who have had immune testing done, made medicine/lifestyle changes because of it, and gotten pregnant.  So, don't tell me it doesn't make a difference.  I am glad that I took today off.

Sunday, November 28, 2010


I cannot believe I have made it this whole time without POAS.  My IVF buddy, the Baby Baker, did this  morning and she got a positive!  Yay!  Go over and congratulate her!

I am really praying for peace and to not be anxious.  I really want a positive test.  I just don't know how to feel or how to pray or how to think or how to not be anxious!  I know that was a grammatically incorrect sentence - so sorry.

We've almost finished putting up our Christmas decorations.  My husband got a new version of Rock Band this weekend for his birthday and he is currently playing that.  Maybe after dinner we can either play together or watch a movie. 

I don't know how I will feel tomorrow either way.  I know I'll obvious be happy for a positive, but will I laugh, cry, run around the house jumping for joy?  I just don't know.  Anything is possible.  What will I do if it's negative?  Will I just take it and be like, "oh well"?  Will I be able to make it through the conversation with the nurse before I start crying?  Will I be able to call my husband with the news?  I am just so glad I took a vacation day tomorrow.  I know I wouldn't get anything done at work. 

I know that God has a plan for me.  I just do not know what that is.  It may be for me to be pregnant right now.  It may be for me to be pregnant in three years from now.  It may be for us to adopt, but I certainly don't feel that right now.  His plan may be for us to live child free.  Whatever the Lord wants for us, we will still have joy in being one of His elect. 

Thanks for reading my spastic post.  Until tomorrow...

Thursday, November 25, 2010

What I Am Thankful For

Update - 9dp3dt

Today is 9dp3dt for me.

I want to record how I have been feeling:

I was constipated, but that has passed. I thought that was why I was bloated, and while I am less bloated, I am still somewhat bloated. 

I am still having cramps off an on.  Some of them are no big deal, but I have had a couple of doozies.  Luckily, they pass quickly.

I have been kind of emotional.  Like, I want to cry at tv shows, etc...  But, that started around the same time that my Vivelle dots started, so I don't know.

Speaking of Vivelle patches, I put my third one on today.  I am changing them every other day.  OUCH!  Removing that thing is super painful.  I'd rather do a subcutaneous inject.  And, you know about my anxiety with needles.

I have been really thirsty.  I am trying to drink a lot of water.

I am feeling calm for the most part, yet I just really can't wait until Monday.  At the same time, I don't want Monday to come.  I can't stand the thought of not being pregnant.  But I feel hopeful.  At the same time, as soon as I feel hopeful, I want to squash it.  The less I hope the less I hurt.  But, obviously I have some hope because I keep not shopping for new clothes. 

So, that's about it.  We're keeping busy.  We've seen the new Harry Potter movie twice, once on the regular screen and once on the IMAX!  I really want to go see Tangled too, but I doubt we'll be able to before Monday.  Tomorrow, we are having my family over for my husband's and BIL's birthday celebrations.  My husband's birthday is today and my BIL's is in January, so we don't want to celebrate it at Christmas.  Saturday, we are having lunch with my husband's parents for his birthday then coming  home, getting out Christmas decorations, and then watching the UGA/GT football game (well, okay, he'll be watching, I'll be decorating).  Then, Sunday is church and then Monday morning is the test!  AHHHHH!!

Monday, November 22, 2010

Am I Being Paranoid?

I have been having some cramping off and on today. Every month, about a week before AF comes, I have cramping. I hope this isn't a bad sign. Can you have cramping after implantation that is a symptom of pregnancy? The nurse told us that the embryos would implant within 24-48 hours of the transfer, so this is too late for implantation cramping. I am trying to not freak out. I am.

Drippings with Goo

Do you all remember this scene at the end of Ghostbusters II?

I have always loved these movies.  This morning, I could feel the Endometrin running out of me (I know, disgusting TMI) and this is the first saying I thought of:  "Why am I drippings with goo?"

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Happy ICLW!

It's already ICLW again!  I can't believe it.  This is really only my second time participating in ICLW, but I have been a "blurker" (blog lurker) for a while. 

Just to give you a little back story on my TTC journey:  my husband and I have been TTC since December 2007.  I have had 4 IUIs, 2 REs, and am currently in the 2WW from my first IVF cycle.  I have also seen a naturopath/nutritionist and two acupunturists. 

Right now we are just praying that our three little embryos have snuggled in and are healthy and thriving in their nice thick lining.  Today I started the Vivelle patches.  I am going to change them everyt other day.  So, I hope that they don't get too gross in the shower.

My RE's nurse said that I needed to come in for a test 12 days after my 3dt.  That would be the Sunday after Thanksgiving.  So, I am going in on Monday, 11/29 for my beta.  I am nervous, excited, scared to death, and I don't know what else.

My acupunturist said to give him a call after I get the results of my beta and we'd make a plan from there.  I just hope I've done everything I can.  I eat pretty healthy and I am on a gluten free/dairy free diet.  I eat mostly chicken and vegetables.  But, I did eat burgers (with no bun of course) and fries a couple of times.  Well, there's nothing I can do about it now. 

I have rambled enough!  I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving!!

Friday, November 19, 2010

Embryo Update

Well, here they are, our three little embryos that were transferred on Tuesday, in all their 4-celled glory!

It's been almost a week since my egg retrieval and 3 days since my 3dt.  I do feel like this week has flown by.  I definitely have mixed emotions.

I am still feeling very tender in the ovary area.  When I have to pee, it is pretty painful.  I have been constipated, which is irritating.  The RE told me to take Colace and it has been helping some, but it is causing some stomach pains.  Some of them are really strong.  At least, I guess that's what that is. 

The RE's office called this morning and told me that the 4 embryos that they were watching, the ones that arrested then started growing again, had stopped growing and they were not intending to freeze any of them.  I thought that I had prepared myself for that, but I felt just as crushed as I did the first time they told us they'd stopped growing on day 2.  Four little lives ended.  Also, now all of our eggs are in one basket, literally.  I really hope at least one of these embryos feels as attached to me as I do to them. 

Then, I got in my car today to leave and my RE had called and left me a message.  Like the actual doctor.  He was just calling to check on me.  I was kind of sad I missed the call. 

So, we're just praying.  We're praying for God's will to be done.  I am trying to trust in the Lord and rest in the truth that His plan is the very best thing for me, no matter what my will is.  I am praying that I can glorify him through this whole process.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Transfer Complete!

We had the transfer this morning.  I had already drunk a lot of water this morning before we even got there and we got there 45 minutes before the scheduled transfer time.  So, I went to the bathroom first thing.  I wasn't sure I'd even make it up there.  Then, I sat there and drank 2 more 16.9 oz bottles of water.  The lady from the lab came and gave us the picture of our embryos and said that they were all three 4 cells, which is the low end of normal.  They wanted to transfer all three.  We had to talk about that for a while because that is a huge risk.  But, she said that they wouldn't suggest it if they thought our chances of having triplets was high.  The chance was probably less than 5%.  That makes me wonder what our chances of getting pregnant at all are with 3 4-cell embryos.  The good news is that the other 4 little embryos have begun to cleave, so they are watching them to see if they turn into blasts and if they do, we'll freeze them! 

I found the transfer to be extremely uncomfortable, almost painful because of how full my bladder was.  However, the actual transfer was not.  It was kind of painful when he threaded the catheter with the embryos in there because it hit the side of my uterine wall, and I didn't realize he was still sticking stuff up in there.  He really didn't tell me anything he was doing, which I thought was dumb.  He kept surprising me and making me jump because I wouldn't be expecting whatever it was I was feeling.  Is it really a great idea to surprise someone who is laying on a table with her rearend hanging off, legs spread, over your feet with a full bladder under the pressure of a speculum and an ultrasound monitor?  No.  I think not. 

But, I am not pregnant until proven otherwise!  I am really excited and nervous.  I am taking it easy today and my blood test for the beta testing is Nov. 29 at 7:30.  I'm not sure when they're supposed to call us about our other 4 embryos, so we are going to call them in a day or two.

I'll scan the picture of our embryos and post them later.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Transfer tomorrow

I just talked to my nurse.  We only have three normally growing embryos left.  The others have arrested growth and are only 1-2 cells.  I am happy that we still have 3, but crushed that so many have died.  If our cells don't mesh well together can we ever acheive a pregnancy?  If this doesn't work, I don't care what the doctor says, I want to be tested.  I want to know the answer.  I am praying that it works though. 

The transfer is at 8am tomorrow morning.  Prayers are appreciated.


I am trying to be productive while waiting to hear from the nurse, but it is almost impossible.  I hope I don't get fired.  I'll try to update as soon as I've told my husband what's going on.  I'm praying for good news!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Fertilization Report

While I was typing that fun post about our wonderful kitties, the nurse called with our fertilization report!  My heart started pounding!!

Of the 9 eggs we got yesterday, 7 fertilized the conventional way.  I was kind of surprised because I was thinking maybe the reason we weren't getting pregnant is that sperm just wasn't penetrating egg.  But, I guess we have definitely learned that that's not it, at least not this time.  My regular nurse will call us tomorrow with an update and a transfer date.  The nurse didn't know what was wrong with the two that didn't fertilize, but I will ask tomorrow because I want to know as much as we can. 

Seven is a good number.  I really would not want to have more than that, but of couse, we would take whatever God gives us.  We have very strong feelings about life. We know that once sperm meets egg, that is a life that God has created in his own image.  So, we have every intention of using every embryo that survives unless that becomes physically impossible, in which case we'll allow them to be adopted. 

I am really excited about what we've heard.  I started the Endometrin vaginal suppositories this morning.  My lining is nice and thick and I want to keep it that way.  Because I have a history of having a thinnish lining, I don't want that to be the problem and to have gone through all this for nothing.  I feel like everything that we can do, we have done it or are doing it.  It's all in God's hands, as it has been all along. 

I interrupt this regularly scheduled infertility blog...

I am sitting here trying to patiently await the call from the nurse to get our fertilization report.  I am not sure what time they usually call.  But, I can't wait to hear!  I am really excited!  My husband was really excited this morning too.  He said that he hoped he could concentrate on church and not think about what we'd hear.  I tend to dwell on things so I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't sleep thinking about everything that happened and that annoying anesthetist.  But, every time I realized I was getting all tense, I would just pray. 

I thought I would share with you all our sweet furkids while I wait.  They are really the most purr-fect cats ever!  I have our two boys sitting on either side of me right now as I type.  We have had them since June of 2005.  They were about 12 weeks old when we got them; they are from the same litter.  They are the sweetest, smartest cats ever.  Maxwell is our sleek, solid black cat.  He is like a panther, a natural-born killer and so beautiful.  He is so loving and definitely a mama's boy.  He likes for me to lean over when I pet him so that my hair falls down and he walks through my hair and sniffs it.  Sometimes he'll be purring while he's sniffing it and his mouth comes open and it's just so loud.  I think it's really sweet.  Sampson is the typical fat cat.  I call him our Kliban cat.  He is black and white and some of the pads on his toes are pink and some are black.  I think that's so cute.  He's so laid back and LOVES to be brushed.  So much so that when he's around, we have to spell the word or he starts meowing adamantly.  Also, we have a brush on the side of our tub for them and while you're petting him he walks over to it, sniffs it, then turns and looks at you.  It really is heart-melting.  Sampson and Maxwell are huge cats.  They each weight just under 15 pounds and they aren't overweight.  They are really well-behaved.  We have tons of bird feeders and chairs close to the windows so the cats can watch birds when they are tired of playing with the gajillion toys we have provided for them.  They have never really caused a lot of havoc - not even with our Christmas tree.  They do like to steal flash drives and hide them though.

Along comes Mathilda.  My husband's boss found her as a teeny tiny kitten under a bush in the snow this past January.  One girl took her home but couldn't keep her so she kept bringing her back to work and of course my husband fell under her spell.  She really was a beautiful kitten - hard to resist.  She has turned our world upside down.  She is hyper and crazy.  Just a ball of energy.  The boys usually go crazy and run like wild-cats for about 15-30 minutes around 9pm each night.  Mathilda is just non-stop.  But, when she sleeps, she sleeps and when she wants attention, she gets it.  We all love her, even the boys.

Now that I have bored you with talk about our kitties, I will steal your heart with pictures of them and all their beautiful adorableness.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Egg Retrieval

My egg retrieval was this morning.  I am doing pretty well.  I really want to sleep but I can't.  We got 9 eggs!   I am excited but a little nervous about the fertilization report tomorrow.  I have had some pain, but not anywhere near as much as I expected.  I have taken Tylenol twice and been drinking a lot of water.  My husband felt like his part went pretty successfully.  I am always worried about that, too.  We want lots of little swimmers!  I am really praying that we are successful and don't have to go through this again.  We'll find out on Monday whether we're having a day 3 or a day 5 transfer (so that's Tuesday or Thursday).

I have decided to not go to church tomorrow morning for a few reasons.  First, I want to make sure I am feeling okay.  Next, I don't want to miss the call for my fertilization report.  Lastly, it's our niece's 9th birthday tomorrow and we're going out to Marietta to celebrate her birthday tomorrow after church and I want to feel well-rested and able to go to that since we won't see them at Thanksgiving and I want to see her open her gifts.

Here is my take on today:

I feel like the anesthetist should be replaced.  She put the IV in the crook of my arm and I really didn't think they usually did that since people generally like to bend their arms and all (not that I'm a medical person or anything, but really...).  Then, she kept lecturing me on how I needed to work on my anxiety issues because I was making things much more complicated and dramatic than they needed to be.  Because that's going to make me feel more calm and taken care of.  I wanted to suggest that she shut up and do her job and let me sit there and hyperventilate and pass out.  As I walked over to the procedure room she said, "We're here to take care of you and you don't trust us."  That was probably the understatement of the day.  I have spent most of my life being told that doctors can't be trusted and medical people will run all over you.  My mom had a near fatal car accident when I was 5 and she eventually had so many surgeries over the years and was in so much pain she committed suicide (when I was 19).  That's all I've ever heard is that doctors don't think of us as real people.  I have worked very hard to not believe that.  I don't necessarily think it's the doctors that act that way for the most part, personally.  I think it's the support staff (some of them, definitely not all - I've met some really caring MAs, nurses, and NPs).  There were two nurses who were super nice but the first person we met really needed to work on her bedside manner.  I think she was a nurse, but I am not sure because she never even introduced herself to us.  We had been told to get there at 7 and got there just at 7 and had someone from the back area let us in and we sat for about 20 minutes waiting for someone from the IVF area to get there.  Then, she just wasn't very...I don't know...but she made me feel automatically nervous and defensive.  Then, apparently there was a communication issue, so the doctor was not there until about 8:15, 15 minutes after my "perfectly timed retrieval" was supposed to start.

The positive is that it's over.  I can lay back down and try to sleep again because it feels much better when I am laying on my side than when I am sitting up.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Tomorrow's the Day

Well, tomorrow is the big day.  I have been feeling a strong urge to barf all day.  I am not sure if it's nerves or maybe side effects from the HCG trigger (I haven't googled it so I am not sure).  But, I am definitely feeling extremely uncomfortable.  I am hoping that my ovaries aren't enlarging out of control and that it's just a bit of gas (I know, TMI).  I survived the trigger last night.  I only had a small teeny panic attack, but I got over it.  It wasn't that bad, I guess.  I just hope I can behave myself tomorrow.  I tend to lose control in situations of high stress, especially if there are doctors and/or needles involved.

I am really praying that this is the only time we have to go through this.  I will be heartbroken if we go through all this and it doesn't work. 

Thursday, November 11, 2010

What I Missed

I talked to my nurse this afternoon.  I had to get the time to trigger and the time for my arrival and egg retrieval time.  I asked about all the stuff I was too busy focusing on not peeing to remember.

Estrogen - 1,952
R - 19.5, 18, 15.5, 15.5
L - 25, 22.5, 21.5, 20, 17.5, 13, 12
Lining - 10.5mm

So, everything seems to be on track.

I am really wishing I had taken tomorrow off.  I have already told my boss that I am taking either next Tuesday or Thursday off.  I don't want to be thinking about work on transfer day!

Trigger Tonight

So I had lots of mature-looking follies so I am going to trigger tonight.  I didn't get the counts and sizes today because they left me in the room waiting for 15 minutes and by the time he did the u/s, I had to pee.  So, the u/s was very uncomfortable - more so than usual. 

The dr. said Saturday's retrieval should be "eggs"ceptional.  ha. ha.

I do not want to be at work today.  I am hating work right now anyway and having this all going on makes me very unmotivated and distracted.

The good news is that when the nurse drew my smiley face yesterday for the HCG trigger, she said I only needed a 1 inch needle and gave me a couple of those.  I feel much less stressed about the trigger now.  The bad news is that now I am focused on the IV and the retrieval and even more stressed.  I hope my husband can stay with me right up until they take me into the retrieval room b/c I am going to be a mess, I am sure.

Acupuncture tomorrow afternoon. 
I need to focus on being positive. 
I need to focus on the gospel and Christ's love.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Wednesday Update

I had another monitoring appointment this morning and it looks like I will not trigger until Thursday unless I hear differently from the nurse.  Of course, she'll call me either way, but things are always subject to change.  This stinks b/c my husband has a free ticket to the Falcons game on Thursday and he won't be able to go because he has to give me the trigger shot.  There's no way I could do this myself. I can't even give myself the subcutaneous shots.  The nurse went ahead and drew a nice cute smiley face on the upper part of my rear before I left, just in case.  She gets too much joy in drawing those things.  Really.

I just heard from her as I was typing this up.  She said that my estrogen is 1530 and that they do want to see  me tomorrow to see if we'll trigger.  My husband is on the fence on whether to go ahead and give away his ticket or wait.

Follice count was good, and the RE even turned it around and showed me since I wasn't in as much discomfort as I was on Monday. 

R - 16.5, 13, 13, 13
L - 17.5, 19, 22.5, 13, 17.5, 15
Lining 9.5mm!

So, I think he wants to give the smaller ones a chance to catch up.  I am starting to feel really nervous.  The nurse told me to relax and not get worked up and I wanted to hit her.  But, I just looked at her and flared my nostrils, gave a small smile, and walked away. 

Monday, November 8, 2010

We're Still In the Game!!

Things went pretty well at the RE today.  Less follies than he'd like but still 5-6 that were "measurable".  I thought my ovaries were going to pop while he did the u/s, really.  I am still doing 300 Gonal-f and 75 Menopur w/ no Lupron and I'll go back on Wednesday, so it's looking like a Friday retrieval or later since we need 36 hours after trigger and they always to retrievals in the morning, which is fine with me.  I am excited and scared and I really don't want to work.  So much so that I forgot my computer today and am working with a loaner.  Yuck!  So much to do.  I wanted to check in though!  Thanks for checking!


Sunday, November 7, 2010

Keeping It Positive

I have been keeping a positive attitude.  I agree with my commenters and my husband that I need to just focus on what the RE said to me personally more than what the nurse said.  Plus, I really feel like things are going on down there.  My pants aren't tight or anything but I am definitely feeling some "different-ness" in that area.  I am not upset that my pants aren't tight or taking that as a bad sign because I am aware that I have less eggs that a lot of people do. Even if my follicles get huge, it still won't feel as bad as someone with 21 eggs.  But I would say I am feeling mild discomfort.  Last night I went to a member of my small group's house for a bonfire for our small group and I was holding one of my friend's just over one-year-old.  He's so cute, he kept taking off my hat and then wanting me to put it back on so he could take it off again.  Anyway, I am getting off subject - well, afterwards, I was thinking I wished I hadn't because it made me feel a little more uncomfortable.  I am looking forward to tomorrow because I just can't stand the wait any longer.  I am going to kick up the prayers tonight for sure. 

Friday, November 5, 2010

Not so Happy Friday

My appointment today did not go well.  I have more follicles this time - 4 on the right that are about 8mm and 4 on the left that are 8mm and 1 that's 11mm.  He said that he was going to up my meds and when I asked him when he thought the retrieval would be, he said it would be Wed. or Thurs.  I mentioned that I wasn't responding well and he said that he didn't think things were going that badly.  But, when I went in to talk to the nurse, she told me that they don't want to see me back until Monday and that if my follicles hadn't grown any, Dr.  P would more than likely cancel my cycle.  So, I was kind of blown over because the doctor was all optimistic and the nurse was all doom and gloom.  And frankly it freaked me out.  I have been very upset all day.  I am just not sure what to think.  All I know is that I need to not worry about it.  I know that God is in control and His will will be done.  I know that.  But, it's still hard not to worry. 

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Results Are In

I had my monitoring scan today.  3 on the left less than 8mm; 3 on the right less than 8mm; lining a 3.  Estrogen 108.  I think that the number of follicles is less than they wanted to see, so they have upped my Gonal-f from 187 per night to 225 per night, still doing 5 units Lupron and 75 Menopur.  I hope this does the job. I ordered more Gonal-f since I'll be using one every 2 days now.  That stuff is SO expensive.  But, it will be worth it when we get pregnant this time.  :)

I had acupuncture today too and he puts a needle between my eyes (he kind of pinches the skin then pushes it at a downward angle, so it's kind of parallel to my forehead.  Anyway, that one gave me a headache today.  I was so glad I didn't plan to go back to work because I still have a headache and I took an hour-long nap when I got home!  I woke up to a 15 pound cat putting all his weight on my stomach with one little paw.  Ouch.  But, it was sweet that he wanted to check on me.  His brother had already taken the spot next to my legs and out new little girl kitty had to jump up there too to get in on the action.  Sweetest.kitties.ever.

Monday, November 1, 2010


I will warn you that this "quick post" has turned out to be kind of long.  You're a trooper if you read to the end.

Well, tomorrow is my second ultrasound of this cycle. 

TMI coming up...

I am a bit nervous because when I went in last Friday, while he said everything looked good, he couldn't see my left ovary because he said I should have gone to the bathroom before I came.  Really?  I had just gone.  But, now I feel all nervous it won't be any different.  I am probably not getting enough fiber in my diet.  I guess I need to eat more vegetables since I can't have whole wheat and things like that.

TMI over...

Besides that, I am surprised at how not freaked out I am.  I mean, I am trying to just not think about the egg retrieval because I am terribly nervous about that.  Like throw up nervous.  I am nervous about the IV, I am nervous I will wake up in the middle, I am nervous they'll mess up the anesthesia and I will not be working with a full deck when I wake up, I am nervous about the pain afterwards.  Just nervous.  Also, I have spent the last two years taking as little medicine as possible, drinking no caffeine or artificial sweeteners, and no alcohol.  And then, three to five days before I get pregnant, I am going to be filling my entire body with anesthesia and then taking pain meds that whole day and probably the next (I think, I am not sure how that works).  But, if you think I am going to suffer through it without pain medicine, well I am not that brave.  I am not into unproductive pain.  I am just thankful that my clinic puts you to sleep.  It seems like all the ones in my area do.  I have read blogs of people (mostly in other countries) where they do not and I think that's kind of cruel.  I mean, why not?  No one wants to remember that. 

I also know that my coworkers are all wondering what is going on with me but we are not talking about this with anyone except for one couple that we are the closest to at church.  We don't want people pulling us to the side to talk to us at church or accidentally saying something or worst of all, giving unwanted advice.  I have two friends that know we're struggling and they are the give advice types. 

"You need to go to a different doctor." 

"I had a neighbor who had a stressful job and when she quit her job she got pregnant.  I think you need to quit your job."  (Really, because then how will I pay for IVF when that doesn't work?)

Two of my close girlfriends (the one who we are telling about IVF and the one in the statement above saying I should quit my job) got pregnant after we'd been trying for a year.  Now, their boys are 6 weeks apart and they are both a little over a year old.  The one in that keeps telling me I should quit my job also says things like, "It's going to be so beneficial for you to be the last to have kids because you can watch us."  Really?  I was the first to get married and while I did think, wow, I wish I had thought of that, I never regretted it.  I think I'd be just fine having been the first to have kids and I know LOTS of great moms at my church. 

I don't know.  I love these girls and I know they love me and would never say something to hurt me.  They are true sisters in Christ and we are close.  I feel like I have kind of distanced myself in some ways to protect myself.  Mainly because I can't share all my struggles and feelings with them because they can't understand.  But, sometimes it does get on my nerves.  I mainly don't talk to two of them about it anymore because there is really nothing else to say since my husband and I have agreed to only tell the one couple.  Also, I figure I am probably just being too sensitive. 

We also have a set of friends that don't know anything about our struggles and the wife in that couple is constantly making comments and asking when we are going to get started.  Because we are going to really tell you if we haven't already.  She's clueless.  I'm afraid my husband is going to go off on her one day.  And he has a lot more patience than I do.  A lot.

What do you think?  Am I too sensitive or would you roll your eyes at some of those things?

Either way, I know that me not being in the "Mom Club" does not keep me from being friends and sisters in Christ with these ladies.  We have a relationship because we share a belief in the gospel and Jesus is our savior.  There is nothing that can change that.  I have to keep reminding myself that and working to be more like Christ.  The more Christ-like I am the less things like that will bother me.  I read something to the gist of this on a blog I found during ICLW and it was such a blessing to me to read that post.  It was such a great reminder.