Thursday, April 28, 2011

Been A Long Time

I know it has been a long time.  I have been trying to spend less time at work and more time with my husband.  Plus, there's not been much time leftover when I am going to therapy for an hour every Monday evening and the Chiropractor every Tuesday and Thursday.  Well, I am down to going to the Chiropractor once every other week for now.  I am still having some mild back pain off and on, but it's usually when I am sitting wrong for a long time or something like that.  I have gotten two positive Ovulation kits (Feb and Mar) but then this month I didn't get one for sure (the line wasn't as dark as the control line). 

Therapy is...interesting.  This is what is basically has consisted of:

  • Talking about things that make me feel frustrated and/or stressed out then coming up with the things I can do/think differently to keep from getting frustrated in those positions, or saying just avoid them.
  • Sitting back in one of those massage chairs wearing headphones listening to my psychologist from another room saying things like (and I'm not kidding) "Feeeeel relaaaaaxed.  Feeeeel gooooooood.  Let your hands feeeeel relaaaaxed, let them get very heavy..."  and so on and so forth.
  • I have been informed that it is my choice to feel stressed out and I have to choose not to be.
  • I have finally informed him that I want to pinpoint specific things that I need to deal with and stop discussing various general things that stress me out and make me feel bad about myself because I need to pray about those things and ask God to help me as I have these things going on in my life that I don't like are put there by God.  Obviously he wants me to go through these trials.  I need to find joy in my life (with the understanding that joy described in the Bible is not the same thing as "happiness").
  • So, we are now talking about how I can't stand when other people invade my personal space without my permission, how much I can't stand doctors and I don't trust them, and my issues with needles.  I think I have caused some frustration for him b/c he seems to want to be able to figure out why I have issues with needles to begin with and the fact is, I don't know!
I really didn't think that it was helping any, but lately I have noticed that I get stressed out less often and when I do get stressed out, it doesn't seem to be as bad. 

We had 12 people besides my husband and I over to our house this past Saturday evening for a game night.  Usually, everyone getting there at the same time and handing me something they've brought or wanting to talk to me will get me all stressed out so much that it would take me half the night to feel like a normal person again.  Well, we were behind on cooking, so my sister and her husband were helping me as well as two of my closest girlfriends and everyone else was walking in and out of the kitchen talking to us or standing in the living room talking.  I was having to tell everyone what to do since I had the plan in my head.  I was remaining fairly calm.  My sister even commented that I would be a good kitchen manager.

I'm still not sure if I am okay with needles.  I mean, how do you tell yourself it's perfectly fine to let someone purposefully stick you with a needle? 

Anyway, that's a taster of what's going on.  I'm sorry it's been so long since I've posted.  I even took about a 3 week break from reading blogs (not on intentionally, it just happened, but I wasn't real sad about not keeping up while I wasn't reading).  But, I have been reading the last few weeks.

My husband and I are also planning to go on a 7 day cruise and a one-day trip to Busch Gardens in a couple of weeks!  I can't wait!

1 comment:

  1. Well, I don't think that anyone is ever REALLY okay with having needles stuck in them. I used to flip out about needles.

    I'm glad that you are feeling less stressed.